It's pretty amazing that I always seem to find my way back to this blog, I dont know how or why the feeling over comes me to write some more in my online diary, but alas, here I am. Well I am in a new location once again, and I am still not sure if its for the best or not. Though I am certain that I am completely tired of packing up and moving about every few months. Hopefully in the end I will have helped to accomplish something for my family and not just myself.
I am currently in Augusta, Georgia living with my cousin, her husband, FOUR kids! They arent bad, just... you know... kids. I still have not found a job and it is really starting to take a toll on me, I really just need to start working to give me something to do as well as some income to start putting my life back together! To tell you the truth, I have let my life get completely out of hand. My finances are in a complete wreck and it is a bit tough to realize how much I am in debt right now. As soon as I can start working though I will finally start focusing on resolving ALL OF IT instead of ignoring anything having to do with money. Once I can get a grip on some of it and can some what breathe again I will be able to start looking into getting back into college and getting started on my goal of becoming an R.N. I have three things I will be focusing on, My money (lack of), My Mind (college), and My Body (losing weight) once I start working that should not be too hard, right?
Other than all that serious personal shit, I have been thinking of legitimately giving YouTube a shot as in make videos regularly and see if anyone would care about what I have to say. In real life I am great at making friends and talking/listening to people why wouldnt it translate to online people? The only thing is that I will have to get over my fear of seeing/listening to myself on video, I feel like I am just weird and fat and people will dismiss me or worse, ridicule me. Then I think FUCK IT! wont hurt to try, what is the worst that could happen? So soon I will start working on content, I already have a few ideas but not sure how my execution will be... But fuck it is almost 4 am so maybe I should close the laptop and come back after some sleep... I wish I could talk into the camera as naturally as typing out text... Well until next time...
Peace. ☮
Seriously if ANYONE reads this feel free to leave a comment or something I love talking to people about ANYTHING haha
Friday, August 9, 2013
Tuesday, September 18, 2012
Relocation!
So yea this is crazy! Currently at a computer in the West Quad of the University of Michigan! hahaha
About a month ago my family and I came up to Michigan for a reunion and after spending a week here, the ball started rolling. On the long drive home my mom and I started talking about it and after plenty of cousins offering up places to stay if I made the decision to pack up and head north, I thought why the hell not. Considering I didn't at the time have a job in Florida (though I had a few options) there wasn't really enough to keep there. Though I ended up leaving really good friends behind, I had been telling myself since we moved down to Florida for the last time that I would be back! Anyway When we got back down to Florida my parents and I started making arrangements to make the trek. >>Fast Forward>>
So my parents ended up right across the street from my dads cousin Marcia, they are in a fairly small cabin but they dont need much right away and my dad should be picking up some work here soon! As for me, the intro is pretty self explanatory, I am in Ann Arbor with my wonderful cousin Kari (who will prob end up reading this :D so ill try to keep it positive ;)...) But seriously it is so crazy how natural this all feels considering I saw her a month ago for like a day and before that it was like 4-5 maybe 6 years ago. Granted we have kept heavily in touch over facebook and spotify and occasionally we would skype but none of that is comparable to living with them in a fairly small apartment. Though it has only been a few days (could be a "honeymoon phase") I think this is gonna be as awesome as we imagined all the time! Nothing has felt awkward or weird, I have met a few of her friends and they are all amazing and hopefully they feel the same about me!
So yea a lot of things have happened over the past week this was just a very condensed version! I really wanna blog again to archive the plenty of epic times I am gonna have in Michigan! I am so much happier then I was in Florida (sorry to all my friends down there I do miss you all) it will be even better when I find a job or two and can start having even more fun and saving up money!
So excited for the Future!!!!!!!
Till Next Time...
Peace ☮
About a month ago my family and I came up to Michigan for a reunion and after spending a week here, the ball started rolling. On the long drive home my mom and I started talking about it and after plenty of cousins offering up places to stay if I made the decision to pack up and head north, I thought why the hell not. Considering I didn't at the time have a job in Florida (though I had a few options) there wasn't really enough to keep there. Though I ended up leaving really good friends behind, I had been telling myself since we moved down to Florida for the last time that I would be back! Anyway When we got back down to Florida my parents and I started making arrangements to make the trek. >>Fast Forward>>
So my parents ended up right across the street from my dads cousin Marcia, they are in a fairly small cabin but they dont need much right away and my dad should be picking up some work here soon! As for me, the intro is pretty self explanatory, I am in Ann Arbor with my wonderful cousin Kari (who will prob end up reading this :D so ill try to keep it positive ;)...) But seriously it is so crazy how natural this all feels considering I saw her a month ago for like a day and before that it was like 4-5 maybe 6 years ago. Granted we have kept heavily in touch over facebook and spotify and occasionally we would skype but none of that is comparable to living with them in a fairly small apartment. Though it has only been a few days (could be a "honeymoon phase") I think this is gonna be as awesome as we imagined all the time! Nothing has felt awkward or weird, I have met a few of her friends and they are all amazing and hopefully they feel the same about me!
So yea a lot of things have happened over the past week this was just a very condensed version! I really wanna blog again to archive the plenty of epic times I am gonna have in Michigan! I am so much happier then I was in Florida (sorry to all my friends down there I do miss you all) it will be even better when I find a job or two and can start having even more fun and saving up money!
So excited for the Future!!!!!!!
Till Next Time...
Peace ☮
Wednesday, November 16, 2011
Hey New Blog Post!...
Kind of was putting this off but I suppose I should(want) to blog some what regularly. Although to be honest the past few days have been pretty boring, I worked all day Sunday, NFL Sunday Ticket up at Grandezza and we actually got pretty busy. I was getting my Bartender/Server on and killing it! But seriously the last two days I have just been working on my K/D (Kill/Death Ratio) on Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 3, I am trying to get it up to a 1.00 ratio for the first time since I started playing CoD games. It frustrates me so much when I play shitty and I know I am better than that (#FirstWorldProblems) Other than that I have been internally struggling to get my fat ass to the gym but have yet to succeed on that front, there is hope for tomorrow as I need to get new front tires so I will have to leave early for work hopefully I can fit the gym sometime in there. Well I guess a short blog but a blog nonetheless and its progress towards consistency... Is there anyone even reading? Oh well its really for me anyway. Chronicling my life!! Until next time...
Peace. ☮
Peace. ☮
Sunday, November 13, 2011
Roller Coaster of Emotion
Wow... Well... Um... Yea...
I have internet again...
I also have gotten some what of a promotion... (making more money)
My dad had a heart attack and could have died this past Monday... (He is still alive thankfully)
So yea my week has been pretty up and down, but hey I am back here blogging again! Yay and now I am thinking of Vlogging again, now that I have internet again! I also have not worked in a week which feels pretty weird cause I took 4 days off for the MW3 LAN that some friends and I had. It kicked off with a terrible and unexpected start.
I was getting ready to leave, getting my stuff in order and my dad asked when I was leaving and I told him like 45 min and he asked me to check on him before I left, he said that he had gotten "overheated". Well like 10 min later he called me back into the living room and told me to call my mom cause he felt like he was having a heart attack, so I did as told and called her of course she started freaking out then my dad told me that I needed to call 911. So i hung up with my frantic mother and called, as I was being talked through the situation my dad called my mom to reassure her and so then we waited for the ambulance. My dad is so amazing, he not only recognized the symptoms right away but when I was looking for aspirin he knew that he needed "low dose" aspirin that was on his night stand. Anyway when the ambulance got there they loaded him up and told me what hospital they were taking him to, I then relayed the message to my mother and took off for the aforementioned hospital. Now I was fairly calm considering through out the ordeal of calling 911 and waiting for the ambulance but when I was on my to the hospital it hit me... and hard, that there was a good chance I might lose my father today and I just started balling. I just do not know what I would have done if he had not of made it, I mean he is my (cliche) hero, the man that taught me everything I know and how to even be a man, the one I have modeled my life after, I am an extension of him. I cried all the way there and even more once I got there and saw my mom, grandma, and aunt. Then my mom told me that the paramedics told her that he had gotten there just in time, I lost it... He had a blockage in one of his main arteries and he was in the middle of a heart attack when he arrived at the hospital. We had to wait for awhile and were told that he was going into the Cath lab where the would check to see where the blockage was and how much damage had been done from the heart attack. During this my sister and her boyfriend started home from Watchula?. So after a little while the doctor came in and said that it was a minor heart attack and not damage had been done and they were able to insert a couple stints in the artery to free up the blockage so no major surgery. He also told us that after about 30 minutes we would be able to see him in the I.C.U. they originally said two at a time so of course it was my mother and I and as soon as I saw him I broke down again, just to see him alive after knowing there was that chance that I would not have gotten to, it was too much... We hung out for awhile then they let my aunt and grandma back to see him before they left and shortly after Katie and Clayton got there. We all just hung out for awhile just happy we were all still here...
It is getting late...
Night...
Peace. ☮
I have internet again...
I also have gotten some what of a promotion... (making more money)
My dad had a heart attack and could have died this past Monday... (He is still alive thankfully)
So yea my week has been pretty up and down, but hey I am back here blogging again! Yay and now I am thinking of Vlogging again, now that I have internet again! I also have not worked in a week which feels pretty weird cause I took 4 days off for the MW3 LAN that some friends and I had. It kicked off with a terrible and unexpected start.
I was getting ready to leave, getting my stuff in order and my dad asked when I was leaving and I told him like 45 min and he asked me to check on him before I left, he said that he had gotten "overheated". Well like 10 min later he called me back into the living room and told me to call my mom cause he felt like he was having a heart attack, so I did as told and called her of course she started freaking out then my dad told me that I needed to call 911. So i hung up with my frantic mother and called, as I was being talked through the situation my dad called my mom to reassure her and so then we waited for the ambulance. My dad is so amazing, he not only recognized the symptoms right away but when I was looking for aspirin he knew that he needed "low dose" aspirin that was on his night stand. Anyway when the ambulance got there they loaded him up and told me what hospital they were taking him to, I then relayed the message to my mother and took off for the aforementioned hospital. Now I was fairly calm considering through out the ordeal of calling 911 and waiting for the ambulance but when I was on my to the hospital it hit me... and hard, that there was a good chance I might lose my father today and I just started balling. I just do not know what I would have done if he had not of made it, I mean he is my (cliche) hero, the man that taught me everything I know and how to even be a man, the one I have modeled my life after, I am an extension of him. I cried all the way there and even more once I got there and saw my mom, grandma, and aunt. Then my mom told me that the paramedics told her that he had gotten there just in time, I lost it... He had a blockage in one of his main arteries and he was in the middle of a heart attack when he arrived at the hospital. We had to wait for awhile and were told that he was going into the Cath lab where the would check to see where the blockage was and how much damage had been done from the heart attack. During this my sister and her boyfriend started home from Watchula?. So after a little while the doctor came in and said that it was a minor heart attack and not damage had been done and they were able to insert a couple stints in the artery to free up the blockage so no major surgery. He also told us that after about 30 minutes we would be able to see him in the I.C.U. they originally said two at a time so of course it was my mother and I and as soon as I saw him I broke down again, just to see him alive after knowing there was that chance that I would not have gotten to, it was too much... We hung out for awhile then they let my aunt and grandma back to see him before they left and shortly after Katie and Clayton got there. We all just hung out for awhile just happy we were all still here...
It is getting late...
Night...
Peace. ☮
Tuesday, August 23, 2011
One Day at a Time....
Wow that last blog post was a doozy! But hey that is how I was feeling at that time and isn't that what this blog is for?... Yep it is, I have calmed down a little now and as the title suggests just taking things one day at a time. Financially, Health wise, and life in general, sometimes people forget that they need to live in the now and not stress too much over what has not happened yet.
Financially im continuing to get things under control only have one more payment of $157 then my car will be completely paid off (YAY!) and season is like a month and a half away then I will be to busy to spend money and will be racking up hoursand overtime so hopefully around March I should be in no debt (maybe my student loan still unpaid in full) but should have quite a savings built up!
As far as my healthiness is concerned, I just started at LA Fitness and the reason I like it there so much is they have a basketball court right in the gym. I love playing basketball, it is fun and an extreme full body work out with cardio built in. So I can shoot hoops to warm up then go run and lift and close out with more basketball. I will be active for longer and the beginning and ending with some basketball will make my gains during the other two activities more efficient and more substantial! Plus I am probably going to go back to a mainly granola/protein bar and protein shake diet hopefully with some organic vegetable and fruit juices.
I am also thinking of Vlogging a little again, of course the videos I would post on here... well I guess that is all I have for today, maybe I will spill all about the changes happening at work tomorrow ugh but until then...
Peace. ☮
Financially im continuing to get things under control only have one more payment of $157 then my car will be completely paid off (YAY!) and season is like a month and a half away then I will be to busy to spend money and will be racking up hoursand overtime so hopefully around March I should be in no debt (maybe my student loan still unpaid in full) but should have quite a savings built up!
As far as my healthiness is concerned, I just started at LA Fitness and the reason I like it there so much is they have a basketball court right in the gym. I love playing basketball, it is fun and an extreme full body work out with cardio built in. So I can shoot hoops to warm up then go run and lift and close out with more basketball. I will be active for longer and the beginning and ending with some basketball will make my gains during the other two activities more efficient and more substantial! Plus I am probably going to go back to a mainly granola/protein bar and protein shake diet hopefully with some organic vegetable and fruit juices.
I am also thinking of Vlogging a little again, of course the videos I would post on here... well I guess that is all I have for today, maybe I will spill all about the changes happening at work tomorrow ugh but until then...
Peace. ☮
Friday, August 19, 2011
Change is MotherF#$%ing Difficult!
"It is easy to tell yourself that you are ready for change but tough as hell to actually change yourself" -ME about 5 hours ago via Google+
The truest words I have typed all day! Its so wonderful to think about all the life changes you want to make but then reality kicks in and you realize that the shit is not going to just happen. You actually need to do shit to accomplish goals, but you are already so use to not doing a goddamn thing and kinda just getting by. You tell your self that everything will work out but if you are not doing anything about it then no, no it will not work out! You will still be a fat piece of shit that just shits around not doing anything to lose weight, continuing to eat shit that you KNOW and TELL yourself every fucking day that you should not eat but you eat it anyway!! Seriously What The Fuck!! I don't know... Maybe I am being a tad hard on myself but fuck it nothing else is fucking working... I will get my Fat ASS to the gym tomorrow whether its LA Fitness or the Gym at the country club I work at. I need to at least start running everyday and get back to lifting. I need to actually use the juicer I bought and eat the vegetables and fruits I fucking bought! I once lost 20lbs in ONE month but somehow I have lost sight of whatever motivation I used to achieve that! I need to find it or another form of motivation! Maybe writing this is stimulating something deep down or maybe I just need to read this every morning to get my self to the gym!
I do not know... But Shit HAS to CHANGE! I can NOT continue to live like this!!!
The truest words I have typed all day! Its so wonderful to think about all the life changes you want to make but then reality kicks in and you realize that the shit is not going to just happen. You actually need to do shit to accomplish goals, but you are already so use to not doing a goddamn thing and kinda just getting by. You tell your self that everything will work out but if you are not doing anything about it then no, no it will not work out! You will still be a fat piece of shit that just shits around not doing anything to lose weight, continuing to eat shit that you KNOW and TELL yourself every fucking day that you should not eat but you eat it anyway!! Seriously What The Fuck!! I don't know... Maybe I am being a tad hard on myself but fuck it nothing else is fucking working... I will get my Fat ASS to the gym tomorrow whether its LA Fitness or the Gym at the country club I work at. I need to at least start running everyday and get back to lifting. I need to actually use the juicer I bought and eat the vegetables and fruits I fucking bought! I once lost 20lbs in ONE month but somehow I have lost sight of whatever motivation I used to achieve that! I need to find it or another form of motivation! Maybe writing this is stimulating something deep down or maybe I just need to read this every morning to get my self to the gym!
I do not know... But Shit HAS to CHANGE! I can NOT continue to live like this!!!
Saturday, August 13, 2011
Over-Hyped/Short Blog
Well today was not nearly as exciting or fun as I was hyping it up to be in my mind, oh well, at least I did not have to work! Now I can not wait til I get paid on Tuesday so I can go out and get a Juicer and start my juice fast. I recently watched a documentary on Netflix called Fat, Sick, Nearly Dead.
I want to start it as soon as possible, on top of that I need to get back in the gym hopefully between the two I should see some pretty extreme results and some real positive changes!
I want to start it as soon as possible, on top of that I need to get back in the gym hopefully between the two I should see some pretty extreme results and some real positive changes!
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